This post isn't a comedic one. It isn't something funny a student said or did. It isn't a stupid comment that made me ask if they really said that. Nothing like that. This post is for my own personal reflection.
Three months ago today my mom died. We found out she had cancer two months before that. To say I wasn't the best teacher during those few months would be a huge understatement. I was very distracted. I lost my temper easily. I was impatient. I lost assignments. I was not a very good teacher. I was so sick of these damn kids who cared nothing about this personal hell I was going through and only wanted me to grade their paper NOW! It was not a time where I could look at what I was doing in my classroom and say "Look at what I did! I rock!" No, it was me looking around saying to myself "What did I just do?"
I was walking on eggshells. Every time the secretary called into my room I was worried it would be to tell me I had a phone call, which is really pathetic since I always had my cell phone in my pocket turned on, ready to answer at a moments notice. I lived in fear for that one call that would tell me my mom was gone. It wasn't pretty.
Yet, even with all of that turmoil, there are some small things that I think of, and they touch me. I had one student stay after class to alphabetize assignments for me, and it wasn't because she needed to make up a tardy!I had other students volunteer to make copies for me, bring me in a Pepsi, organize books, or just ask what they could do. Just knowing that these people cared enough to not only put up with my very emotional days, but tried to make them better made it possible for me to go on.
One of the things that meant the most to me happened on my first day back after the funeral: a student brought me in a sympathy card. It was a very simple thing, yet it meant the world to me to know that this boy had been thinking of me enough to buy me a card, and carry it around with him until I came back. That simple card made my day so much better, and it made me stop wallowing in self-pity.
I learned one of my most valuable lessons at this time. Students are people, and they care about you. Even if you had to have a meeting with this student and his parents and the principal. Yes, even then. They still care.
